Issue 259710043: Improve wording for an NR paragraph
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Created:
8 years, 7 months ago by simon.albrecht Modified:
8 years, 7 months ago CC:
lilypond-devel_gnu.org Visibility:
Public. |
DescriptionImprove wording for an NR paragraph
The paragraph from "Avoid (or reduce)" in spacing.itely
used 'for example' twice in a row. The description of the
'volta bracket' issue was unclear in terminology and phrasing.
Patch Set 1 #
Total comments: 6
Patch Set 2 : React to comments by Dan and James. #MessagesTotal messages: 8
I came across this rather mishapen wording in NR 4.6.2 – so I changed it.
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LGTM Trevor
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https://codereview.appspot.com/259710043/diff/1/Documentation/notation/spacin... File Documentation/notation/spacing.itely (right): https://codereview.appspot.com/259710043/diff/1/Documentation/notation/spacin... Documentation/notation/spacing.itely:3489: will take up more space than if they are on the same system. "If these endings are spread over two systems, they take up more space than if they were on the same system." https://codereview.appspot.com/259710043/diff/1/Documentation/notation/spacin... Documentation/notation/spacing.itely:3490: Or dynamics that @q{stick out} of a system can be moved closer to the staff: Starting a sentence with "or" seems too informal. How about, "Another example is..."? Perhaps we could keep just one good example and throw away the other one; or if they are both equally important, maybe they deserve to be separate items.
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LGTM, Marc Am 02.09.2015 um 21:26 schrieb simon.albrecht@mail.de: > Reviewers: , > > Message: > I came across this rather mishapen wording in NR 4.6.2 – so I changed > it. > > Description: > Improve wording for an NR paragraph > > The paragraph from "Avoid (or reduce)" in spacing.itely > used 'for example' twice in a row. The description of the > 'volta bracket' issue was unclear in terminology and phrasing. > > Please review this at https://codereview.appspot.com/259710043/ > > Affected files (+4, -5 lines): > M Documentation/notation/spacing.itely > > > Index: Documentation/notation/spacing.itely > diff --git a/Documentation/notation/spacing.itely > b/Documentation/notation/spacing.itely > index > d88fa8b27e30c7066f0bf4c11f892c2f960f46e1..a286214f072247feed82b36202ed838a0fab83dc > 100644 > --- a/Documentation/notation/spacing.itely > +++ b/Documentation/notation/spacing.itely > @@ -3484,11 +3484,10 @@ assignment will force a layout with 2 pages. > > @item > Avoid (or reduce) objects that increase the vertical size of a > -system. For example, volta repeats (or alternate repeats) require > -extra space. If these repeats are spread over two systems, they > -will take up more space than one system with the volta repeats and > -another system without. For example, dynamics that @q{stick out} of > -a system can be moved closer to the staff: > +system. For example, volta brackets for alternative repeat endings > +require extra space. If these endings are spread over two systems, they > +will take up more space than if they are on the same system. > +Or dynamics that @q{stick out} of a system can be moved closer to the > staff: > > @lilypond[verbatim,quote] > \relative e' { > > > _______________________________________________ > lilypond-devel mailing list > lilypond-devel@gnu.org > https://lists.gnu.org/mailman/listinfo/lilypond-devel
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https://codereview.appspot.com/259710043/diff/1/Documentation/notation/spacin... File Documentation/notation/spacing.itely (right): https://codereview.appspot.com/259710043/diff/1/Documentation/notation/spacin... Documentation/notation/spacing.itely:3490: Or dynamics that @q{stick out} of a system can be moved closer to the staff: On 2015/09/03 01:28:06, Dan Eble wrote: > Starting a sentence with "or" seems too informal. How about, "Another example > is..."? Perhaps we could keep just one good example and throw away the other > one; or if they are both equally important, maybe they deserve to be separate > items. Yes I'd concur with Dab. I'd simply remove the word 'Or', use a semi-colon instead of a full stop and continue with the sentence as it is. We typically use a semi colon at the end of 'sentences' that are about to be illustrated by an @lilypond example (i.e. instead of the colon you've put here).
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React to comments by Dan and James.
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Thanks for the input. https://codereview.appspot.com/259710043/diff/1/Documentation/notation/spacin... File Documentation/notation/spacing.itely (right): https://codereview.appspot.com/259710043/diff/1/Documentation/notation/spacin... Documentation/notation/spacing.itely:3489: will take up more space than if they are on the same system. On 2015/09/03 01:28:05, Dan Eble wrote: > "If these endings are spread over two systems, they take up more space than if > they were on the same system." Done. https://codereview.appspot.com/259710043/diff/1/Documentation/notation/spacin... Documentation/notation/spacing.itely:3490: Or dynamics that @q{stick out} of a system can be moved closer to the staff: On 2015/09/03 09:27:51, pkx wrote: > On 2015/09/03 01:28:06, Dan Eble wrote: > > Starting a sentence with "or" seems too informal. How about, "Another example > > is..."? Perhaps we could keep just one good example and throw away the other > > one; or if they are both equally important, maybe they deserve to be separate > > items. > > Yes I'd concur with Dab. I'd simply remove the word 'Or', use a semi-colon > instead of a full stop and continue with the sentence as it is. We typically > use a semi colon at the end of 'sentences' that are about to be illustrated by > an @lilypond example (i.e. instead of the colon you've put here). A look into the beginning of the NR showed that either a full stop or a colon is being used. https://codereview.appspot.com/259710043/diff/1/Documentation/notation/spacin... Documentation/notation/spacing.itely:3490: Or dynamics that @q{stick out} of a system can be moved closer to the staff: On 2015/09/03 01:28:06, Dan Eble wrote: > Starting a sentence with "or" seems too informal. How about, "Another example > is..."? Perhaps we could keep just one good example and throw away the other > one; or if they are both equally important, maybe they deserve to be separate > items. I chose ‘As another example,’. It’s plain to me that in this is only one item in the list, with two examples. I think they’re both valuable.
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> It’s plain to me that in this is only one item in the list, with two examples. I > think they’re both valuable. ‘that this is only one item in the list’
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